My dad died last week. Two days before his 80'' birthday party. He was an engineer and liked to plan things meticulously so he either didn't want to turn 80 or didn't want an 80th birthday party. Which it was we will never know, but 'd surmise It was the latter. He was born in 1944, just before the end of World War 2, and midway between the birth of Joe Biden, in 1942, and Donald Trump in 1946. He was a baby boomer, just like Donald Trump, who some will argue represents the best, and even more will argue, the worst, of the boomer generation. He was the third of 4 children and the only boy. Of course, being the only boy, he was considered at the time to be the most intelligent of all his siblings and was reared - by his mom, dad and all of society - to succeed in life. His sisters had an easier task simply to find a well-groomed, well-bred, and successful husband, just like my dad was being groomed to be. In the time between completing matric and finding a husband they were sent off to grooming school aka secretarial college. Lo and behold, they all were married and had a bun in the oven before graduation day. Except for my dad's youngest sister who struggled to fall pregnant, so she had to work for a big chunk of her adult life- or at least until she tell pregnant at the age of 36. Her husband would have preferred that she stayed at home -because that's what women did - but she didn't much like cooking, hated cleaning, and quite frankly was quite intelligent. In 1952, at the age of 8, my dad was sent off to boarding school to learn how to become a man. He went through initiations to become tough and strong and dominant. He was taught that to be successful he must play rugby and be good at maths and science, and most certainly not follow a creative path because that would make life hard. Luckily for him he was good at maths and science and rugby resulting in him being shipped off to university in 1962 to study civil engineering. A few years later, in 1967, he was fortunate enough to meet my mom, an innocent farmers daughter from the Eastern Cape. She was exceptionally pretty, an extremely accomplished tennis player, head prefect and most importantly she was perfectly well bred to find an accomplished husband. Being the driven, ambitious and motivated lady that she was she was married before she was legally allowed to be, requiring her dad to sign her marriage certificate. Which he VERY proudly did. At 22 she had her first child and her second, being me, at 24. She and my dad bought their first house when she was 25 and they were living in their forever home by the time she was 30. My mom had four siblings. Her eldest brother didn't have the same dad as her. My grans first husband was killed in WW2 so he couldn't inherit the farm that came with my gran’s second marriage to my grandfather, my mom's dad, so he was shipped off to the USA to study journalism. My mom was the second eldest and her next sibling, a sister that was a year younger, was the rebel in the family because she went off to university to study teaching, followed by her medical degree, followed by her master's degree in anaesthetics, eventually becoming a world renowned anaesthetist at Red Cross Children Hospital and later receiving a professorship at the University of Cape Town. She only married at the age of 43 and never had any children of her own, although she was an outstanding stepmother to 3 boys. My mom's younger brother received the family farm, because that's what the rules said, and her younger sister managed to find a good man and settle down before completing her nursing qualification. I was brought up in the height of apartheid in South Africa - In the seventies and eighties - I didn't know what apartheid was, but my journalist uncle became an editor for the Star newspaper and was considered a left wing liberal journalist. As a result, he was always being followed by the secret service which is how I learnt about apartheid. I asked my dad why black cars were always outside our house when my uncle visited and he told me it was so that the government could keep tabs on him because he knew too many people that were considered enemies of the state. When I asked him, what apartheid was, he asked me if I thought Lettie - the black lady that looked after and nurtured me - a very strong willed, intelligent fiery, protective saint that I adored with all me being, should be equal to me. I was taken aback. I didn't know that she wasn't equal to me and said that I would he the luckiest boy alive if ever had the opportunity to be anything as close to magnificent as she was. He very simply said "never forget that my boy". Thanks to Lettie and my mom I learnt the strength and humility of women at a young age. In the late eighties, my brother and I were both in high school and my mom declared one day that she was bored of being a part-time secretary. Her dad said hallelujah and bought her a red briefcase for her new, undefined business venture, and IRONICALLY told her that she was always destined for more and that he was proud of her. And my dad - a man born into a man's world where women were there to serve their husbands and look after the family - encouraged her all the way- to the start line and beyond, always being her biggest supporter. It is probably for this reason that they were together for 57 years. Because men didn't want their wives to work in those days and the man of the household always had the final say. Their word was gospel. But not my dad, he encouraged her, supported her and was never threatened by her success. I know this doesn't sound too remarkable these days - but the boomer generation were the architects of divorce and infidelity and broken families - because women liberation movements started gaining traction, giving women a voice and fighting for equality - and most men couldn't accept the challenge. Now my dad was a pretty decent guy but in reality, societal consciousness - our values, beliefs and behaviours - were shifting and he was intelligent enough to adapt. Largely because he loved my mom dearly and didn't want to lose her! But many of his generation didn't, and still haven't, desperately trying to force their will on the world. Still believing that they are the patriarchs of society, still hanging onto power, promising to restore the world to what it was - think Trump promising to "Make America Great again" or Biden still thinking that he can run for a second term of presidency, or even Jacob Zuma wanting to regain control of South Africa. Our world has changed. South Africa has changed. The American dream was rooted in racism, sexism and every other "ism", as was South Africa. We might feel that the present is tough but when it comes to liberation, freedom, equality and diversity, we are way better off than we've ever been. But let's be honest. It's still a man’s world. And to succeed in a man’s world, well, you must behave like a man. Or do you? Luckily, the winds of change are upon us. Masculine leadership traits – assertiveness, decisiveness, competitiveness, independence, dominance, strength, power and control- got us to where we are today. But they aren't going to take us where we need to go tomorrow. Masculine leadership has led to decades of breakthrough innovation, improvements in living standards, poverty reduction, step changes in life expectancy, economic growth, wealth creation, and so the list goes on, but, as we all know, life is about debits and credits, and any excess is countered with a corresponding deficit, in this case being… - Materialism - Consumerism - Over consumption - Reckless exploitation of our planet's resources - Destruction of ecosystems - Global warming - Climate change - Growing divide between the rich and poor - Depression - Anxiety - Suicide Masculinity defines a successful life as "those that reach the top". It's a dog-eat-dog competition to get to the top and the closer to the top you get, the more you need to flaunt your success. But not everyone can reach the top. In fact, nobody ever reaches the top because every time you reach the next strata, you open a whole new level of competition. A whole new level or competition opens a whole new level of materialism which opens up a whole new level of consumerism. And the deficit gap just widens even more. Enough is NEVER enough. Earth overshoot day is the day in the year that we have consumed more of our planetsresources than can be replaced in that year. In 1970, our annual consumption equalled our annual replenishment rate, by 2020 we had a five-month deficit, in other words bythe end of July 2020 we had already consumed more than we could replenish in that year. Our planet doesn't have the resources to continue on a path of unbridled growth and consumerism. Or a path of greed and hedonism. Besides this excessive consumption, our world order is also at risk of being disrupted by artificial intelligence. By 2029. the smartest "being" in the world will be a machine. By 2045 Al will be 1 billion times smarter than humans. We might develop the machines but we won't be controlling them because they are programmed to learn through human "on-line" behaviour, which, as we all have experienced is not always indicative of the best of human behaviour. Who is going to nurture and guide these machines to be a force for good in the world? Our limited intelligence is destroying our planet. We are intelligent enough to create but not intelligent enough to understand the impact of our creations. To be specific, masculine intelligence and masculine leadership Is destroying our planet. And we are all to blame because society has bred men to believe that they are more intelligent than women, as well as convincing women that they are less intelligent than men. As a case in point, when men and women are asked to estimate their OWN intelligence in an SEI test, that means Self Estimated Intelligence test, men throughout the world across different age, ethnic and cultural groups, always estimate their intelligence to be higher than that of their female counterparts. It's called the male hubris and female humility effect. Hubris means you have exaggerated pride and self-confidence. Humility means you are modest or have a low view of one's importance. So, if there is ONE thing that men can teach women, it's that bullshit baffles brains. Seriously though, the only thing that men have over women, that has been proven in research time and time again, is confidence and self-esteem. And it all starts at home. In various social research studies where parents are asked to estimate the intelligence of their children, sons are rated significantly more intelligent than daughters. And when children are asked whether their mother or father is more intelligent, fathers are rated as more intelligent than mothers. This finding has been replicated repeatedly across the world. The same applies to self-esteem. Unsurprisingly, women rate their self-esteem significantly lower than men, with this difference emerging early in adolescence. The problem is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy: if you think you can't, you won't. When girls undervalue their intelligence in school, they tend to choose less challenging course content which limits their education and career choices after school. We need to lift girls' aspirations if they are to go on to solve the complex problems our society needs them to solve. It starts early with gendered parental biases – and expectations - of intelligence and self-esteem between boys and girls. Wouldn't it be nice if we could build the confidence of girls and women to a level where they believe in themselves and are free of doubts? Wouldn't it be nice if we took this a step further and embraced feminine values and virtues to make our world a better place? Wouldn't it be nice if we empowered women to be the best of themselves and for men to shamelessly embrace their feminine side? Because, gosh, we need it now more than ever. I was recently listening to a podcast with Mo Godwat who wrote the book "Scary Smart" and the last question he was asked was "what are the failures you cherish the most?" and his answer was "I have failed for many, many years to empower my feminine side. It's my biggest failure ever. It's the world's biggest failure ever”. He went on to say "our world is suffering from hyper masculinity. We've turned our world into a world of doing. A lot of stuff. Stuff that we don't need. Stuff that doesn't nourish. And it's because we have capitalized so much in our modern world on skills like analytical thinking, linear thinking, strength, discipline, control. All of these are masculine traits. Masculine and feminine are not man and woman but rather traits that correlate to masculinity and femininity. When you over-do masculine traits, they work against you. Strength is good but if you over-do it, you become aggressive. Linear thinking is good but if you over-do it, you become stubborn. We have ignored the feminine qualities that are life-giving, nurturing, Intuitive, creative, playful, empathetic. We've created a world that is so lacking in all of these traits that humanity is on the wrong side of being. We are not showing our good side. We are not able to nourish, nurture, empathise. And to make matters worse, as we empower women today we force them to become masculine, we force them to become competitive, we force them to become tough. Because the game is played that way”. The rules of the game need to change. After centuries of masculine dominated world order, it’s time to lead like a woman. Because women are more likely to: - see the big picture and consider the long-term impact of their actions - use the power or Intuition and creativity to solve big world problems - embrace the power of collaboration through other people, organisations and competitors, rather than seeing them as a threat - empathise, listen and understand differing viewpoints and find solutions that benefit all - develop and grow the leaders of tomorrow, including machines and artificial intelligence, to work for the benefit of mankind rather than its destruction - be more agile, adaptable and resilient - be more approachable and open to feedback, building trust and credibility - and finally, they are more able to prioritise the well-being of people - and quality of life - ahead of ego and materialism The idea of feminine leadership is not intended to create a binary opposition between men and women as leaders, but to recognise and value different leadership styles and to recognize that men, women, and those that identity themselves differently, can have qualities associated with feminine leadership. However, given that it's still a man's world, it begs the question "how do we create the space to embrace feminine leadership?" I am not going to pretend that this is easy. I worked for a staunchly masculine organization that values authority, hierarchy, autocracy, power and dominance to get things done, and it has been highly successful. The exco is staunchly middle-aged white men, bar one female that's head of HR. The result is monochrome conformity, a one-dimensional view of leadership and culture which permeates throughout the entire organization. But it's a model that's working so why change what's not broke? Therein lies the biggest threat to the change that we need. Because it is broke. Because our measures of success are wrong. But there is light at the end of the tunnel: younger generations are streaks ahead of older generations when it comes to embracing both their feminine and masculine traits. As much as we might be critical of woke culture, it embraces diversity and encourages people to be their truest selves, outside of societal expectations. there is a societal shift away from materialism being signs or success to the impact you can have by being your truest and best self human consciousness is shifting from "me" to "we" where success at the expense of others is not considered success at all. organisations are becoming more purpose led and see "better business" as a strong point of difference rather than a legislative tick box. "sustainable" business processes that do less harm to our world are no longer good enough. Business now needs to regenerate our world and fix the damage that has been done. and the best part is that the world's biggest economic opportunity is regenerative business process and product re-engineering These are all virtues of feminine leadership. As I've repeatedly said, there has never been a better time to lead like a woman. For ladies, I encourage you to be your authentic selves. Don't become a man to win in a man's world. Rather be a Jacinda Ardern or an Angela Merkel than a Donald Trump or Joe Biden or Vladimir Putin. Jacinda Ardern decided to step down from being prime minister of New Zealand in her early forties because she felt she had done what she needed to do and wanted to spend more time with her family. Donald Trump is 78 and re-running for the American presidency to "make America Great Again" and Joe Biden honestly thought that he could be in the running for a second term or presidency when he is losing his mind. For men, stop being so fearful. Stop thinking about what you had. Stop thinking about what you’re losing. Think about what you can gain. Embrace your feminine side, embrace diversity, embrace difference, embrace togetherness. Be part of the change. Lead from the front. Lead from within. Start seeing the kaleidoscopic beauty of a diverse and united future From a personal point of view, driving leadership and cultural change in a staunchly masculine organisations is incredibly difficult, but it is possible. What I can tell you is that once the ball starts rolling it picks up seed and becomes very difficult to stop. This is very simply because the broader organisation, especially younger generations and marginalized groups, which make up the majority of organizations in South Africa these days, are so desperate for change that you just have to open the door slightly and they will throw it wide open. I can offer you a little bit of advice, but my list is by no means exhaustive: First and foremost, support each other. Encourage each other. Don't compete. Just because you made it to the top, doesn't mean that you can suppress your compatriots. Your job is still to grow, nurture and develop them. Prepare them for your job. Prepare yourself for your next job. Real change means giving more of yourself. Emotionally, physically and intellectually. You will be the tallest tree that catches the most wind. It is not easy and takes incredible drive determination and belief in yourself and your mission to relentlessly follow it through. There will be many obstacles along the way and there will be many people that are threatened by you. Win them over through the power of empathy. Understand their fears and concerns and find ways to help them see what they can gain rather what they will lose. Remember that it's not a war! Hyper masculinity thrives on competition, strength and dominance. Don't play them at their own game because you will lose. Find male allies that can drive change from within. They have more opportunity than anyone to influence, engage and open minds. You will be surprised how many have simply adapted to the environment they’re in but can still see it for what it is. Sometimes they just need a little nudge. For men that are in leadership positions, embrace diversity in your teams, and encourage others to do the same. This doesn't just mean inviting them into your home and obeying your rules but being prepared to say it's our home and changing the rules to truly represent your new family. The fastest way to drive positive and long-lasting change is to embrace difference in thought and opinion. Remember that real success can only be realized by working together. You will achieve so much more through the power of collaboration, a skill that women are so much better at than men. And finally, have patience. But never take the foot off the pedal I dare you to be brave enough lead like a woman.

 I often get asked if “vision” and “mission” statements are still relevant in today’s business world – or perhaps remnants of a bi-gone business era – and whether they have been usurped by “purpose”? If they still have a role to play, how are they reconciled with a company’s purpose in a manner that will tell a simple and concise story, providing the guiding light to a more desirable future state. The biggest failure many companies make is writing complicated transformational strategies that capture a plethora of ideas but don’t have a single thread holding them all together, making them difficult to understand and near impossible to execute. I like to say that your “vision” grounds you. It grounds you because it puts a stake in the ground with regards to a new future state that you are striving towards. “Vision” answers the “what” question – what type of business do you want to be and what do you hope to achieve? Simply put, it is about making a public statement about your future hopes and ambitions. If a company is hoping to expand into adjacent categories, or hopes to broaden its scope, or completely change direction, this is where it is done. As an example, if a fossil fuel company decided that fossil fuels were damaging to the environment and that they were consequently going to invest heavily in clean energy sources, this is where they would state that ambition. Where a vision grounds you in a desired future state, your purpose guides you. It is your moral compass and answers the “why” question - why do you do what you do? Your “why” is not about achieving quarterly sales targets or maximizing shareholder return but rather why your products and services make the world a better place. Purpose is the heartbeat of an organisation and should provide the north star for all decisions, actions and behaviours. Ideally it should be a single-organizing-thought that captures the essence of an organisation’s strategic imperatives, making it clear how they all work together in achieving the organisations ambitions. By way of example, Patagonia’s purpose is to “use business to inspire and implement solutions to the environmental crisis”. As a consequence, they pledge 1% of sales to the preservation and restoration of the natural environment, they design “timeless” clothing so that it doesn’t need to be replaced regularly, they repair clothes for free, they share blueprints for environmentally friendly materials with their competitors, they take back clothes at the end of their life for recycling, and they partner with Ebay to enable the re-use of their clothing through second hand buying and selling. “Mission” drives you. It answers the “how” question – the strategies and tactics that are necessary to realise your vision and purpose. As a company embarks on a shared value journey, it is often useful to divide its mission into 3 categories – profit, people, planet – and cluster its core strategies under these headings, depending on the role they are playing in the company's transformation journey. It helps tell the story in the simplest and most concise manner, keeping shared value at the heart of the story. So, in essence, vision grounds you, purpose guides you, and mission drives you. It’s as simple as that. About the Author: Mike Middleton is a seasoned marketer and business leader. He is the founder and CEO of Marty McFly, a strategy and innovation agency that helps organisation’s and brand’s make better decisions today for a brighter tomorrow.